Gen X at Heart: Why I’m More Than Just the Oldest Millennial

Hey there! Let me tell you why I’m convinced I belong to Generation X, even though technically, I was born in 1981, right on the cusp of being a Millennial. In other words, I am late Gen X and Early Gen Y, I know, some people love labels and timelines, but when I look at my life, my values, and my experiences, it screams Gen X. Let me break it down for you because this isn’t about splitting hairs, it’s about identity.

The Analog Childhood: When the World Was Offline

Growing up in the ‘80s and early ‘90s meant living life offline. There was no scrolling, no endless notifications, and no FaceTime. I didn’t grow up with Wi-Fi; I grew up with “please rewind the tape before returning it.” Saturday mornings were for cartoons on actual TV, and if you missed an episode, too bad, you waited for reruns.

I remember recording songs off the radio, hoping the DJ or where I am from FM Radio in Pakistan, I wouldn’t talk over the intro. That was my Spotify. If you needed to call a friend, you memorized their number or kept a paper address book. Millennials grew up immersed in digital tech, but for me, getting online felt like entering a new dimension, exciting but not second nature.

Independence: The Gen X Rite of Passage

Gen X kids didn’t get participation trophies or constant supervision. We got freedom. You’d walk yourself to school, ride your bike across town without a helmet, and come home when the streetlights turned on. Nobody worried about GPS tracking your every move or even using a GPS.

Before GPS, it was a paper maps like Thomas Guide for west coast was originally called the Popular Street Atlas, Street Guide, and Popular Atlas and in Indiana, you can get it printed maps from town and county or any AAA stores.

I remember coming home from school and making my own lunch, like peanut butter and jam sandwiches or cold turkey bologna sandwiches, because both my parents were at work. I had to figure things out on my own, without a parent hovering over me. Millennials? Their generation coined terms like “helicopter parents.” For us, independence wasn’t just a value; it was a way of surviving.

Pop Culture That Defined Me

Let’s talk about pop culture. I grew up on a steady diet of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, The Wonder Years, and The Breakfast Club. My music icons were Nirvana, Tupac, Aerosmith, and Biggie. I’ll never forget how powerful it was the first time I heard “Smells Like Teen Spirit”. It wasn’t just music; it was a movement.

Millennials, on the other hand, grew up with boy bands, and High School Musical. By the time those things showed up, I was already rolling my eyes like, “Yeah, not my thing.” My teen years were about rebellion, questioning authority, and finding meaning in lyrics that hit deep.

Tech: From Novelty to Necessity

I didn’t grow up with tech, it grew up with me. My first computer was a hand-me-down with no internet connection. When I needed to research something, it was off to the library with a stack of index cards.

By the time the internet arrived, I was a teenager. AIM chats and Napster downloads felt revolutionary, but they weren’t my childhood. Millennials, meanwhile, had smartphones by the time they were in middle school. That changes how you see the world. For me, tech was something you adapted to, not something you relied on.

The Gen X Work Ethic

Gen Xers are known for their “just get it done” mentality, and that’s me to the core. I started working in a world where you didn’t expect constant feedback or gold stars. You clocked in, did your job, and clocked out. Work-life balance wasn’t a buzzword; it was just something you figured out for yourself.

Millennials are more collaborative and thrive on feedback and recognition, which is great for them. But for me, work is about results, not participation.

Personal Stories That Prove My Gen X DNA

Let me hit you with a few snapshots from my life:

  • The Music Revolution: I still remember buying my first cassette of Nirvana’s Nevermind and how it felt like holding a piece of rebellion. That music shaped my worldview.
  • First Internet Encounter: Logging into AOL on a dial-up connection was pure magic. The fact that it took five minutes to load one webpage didn’t even matter.
  • DIY Problem-Solving: When my Walkman broke, I didn’t Google “how to fix it.” I opened it up and tinkered until it worked.

What Makes Gen X Different

Gen X grew up in a world of contradictions. We were told to be independent but also to work within the system. We saw the Berlin Wall fall, grunge rise, and the internet take its first steps. That shaped us into skeptical but resourceful people who value freedom and authenticity.

Millennials, on the other hand, grew up in a more connected world. Their formative years were about building communities online, embracing change, and being optimistic about the future. Those are amazing traits, but they’re not me.

Why It Matters

You might be wondering, “Why do you care so much about being Gen X?” Well, it’s not just about what I call myself, it’s about how I see the world. My values, my upbringing, and my outlook align with Gen X. I’m proud of that identity.

Sure, I could technically be labeled the “oldest Millennial,” but that doesn’t fit. Millennials’ milestones, like growing up with social media or learning through interactive apps, aren’t my milestones. Gen X’s defining moments, from mixtapes to grunge, are mine.

Final Thoughts

I’m not here to bash Millennials, they’re awesome in their own way. But I’m not one of them. Born in 1981, I’m a proud Gen Xer who grew up in a world of landlines, cassette tapes, and independence. I’m the bridge between two eras, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

So, if you’re a fellow ‘80s kid, especially someone caught between these generations like me, let’s chat. Do you feel more like a latchkey Gen Xer or a tech-savvy Millennial? I’d love to hear your story.

Honoring the Choice: Coming Together to Support Our President

In a democracy, choosing a leader is one of the most powerful ways “We The People” shape our country’s future. The office of the President of the United States represents not only leadership but also unity for our nation. No matter our personal opinions or political views, once the majority has spoken, respecting the President means respecting our democratic process and the choice made by fellow Americans. With the election, President Trump as the 47th President of the United States, it’s a time for all of us to come together.

Congratulations to President Trump on becoming our nation’s new leader!

The Power of Our Vote

I believe that one of America’s strengths is our right to vote and to have a voice in who leads us. This process is a privilege many people around the world don’t have, so when we respect election results, we honor the freedom that comes with voting. When a candidate wins, it’s because millions of Americans have chosen them. Respecting the outcome means valuing each person’s vote and the democratic system that lets us speak out, even if our views differ. Democracy calls us to find unity, even in our differences.

Respecting the Office of the President

For me, the office of the President is bigger than any one person; it represents an institution that leads and serves the entire country. When we respect the President, we help keep stability and unity in our society. Especially during times when political views are so divided, I think it’s important to remember that respecting a leader doesn’t mean we have to agree with every policy. Instead, it means we honor the position and the choice of the American people, which allows for a peaceful transition of power.

Setting an Example for the Next Generation

I often think about how my actions shape the next generation’s understanding of democracy. By showing respect for the President, I believe I’m teaching young people that unity and citizenship matter. They can learn from us that even when people disagree, we can still show respect and stay united. Our kids see that we’re all bound by a common set of democratic values and a shared hope for a brighter future, even if we sometimes see things differently.

Moving Forward Together

Supporting the President doesn’t mean giving up my own beliefs or overlooking the issues I care about. The strength of our country is in its diversity of opinions and the freedom to express them. But I know it’s possible to voice concerns respectfully while still supporting the person in office. Now is a time to focus on working together, sharing our opinions politely, and helping to move forward for everyone’s good. As President Trump now represents America to the world, and his success is linked to our success as a nation.

Praying and Hoping for the Future

Sometimes, all we can do is pray and stay hopeful. Whether or not we each voted for President Trump, he is now our leader, and I believe it’s good to pray for his wisdom and strength as he takes on this role. Every President faces big challenges, and it’s in everyone’s interest that our leader is guided by good intentions and wise decisions for all Americans.

In closing, I believe that respecting the President is really about respecting the democratic principles that hold us together. America is a country built on diverse views, open conversations, and a shared commitment to building a better future. By respecting the office, I’m honoring these values, and I hope to strengthen our democracy and encourage unity for the years ahead. Congratulations once again to President Trump on becoming the 47th President of the United States, and may his leadership bring us together as a nation.

Overcome Emotional Barriers: Lessons from Fck Your Feelings

Mastering Your Mind: Key Lessons from Fck Your Feelings by Ryan Munsey

In a world driven by instant gratification, emotions often steer us toward comfort and away from challenge. Ryan Munsey’s Fck Your Feelings: Master Your Mind, End Self-Doubt, and Become a More Significant Human takes a hard stance against letting emotions rule our decisions. Instead, he challenges readers to embrace discomfort, reject excuses, and cultivate a mindset of discipline and resilience.

Munsey’s central thesis is that feelings are unreliable, often acting as roadblocks to success. While emotions have their place, relying on them to guide your actions can lead to inconsistency and failure. Munsey argues that true progress comes not from “feeling like it,” but from mastering the mind and taking action despite how we feel.

Here are some key takeaways from the book, along with expanded insights on how to implement these principles in your life.

1. The Problem with Emotional Decision-Making

One of the main points Munsey drives home is that feelings can sabotage your decision-making. Emotions, he argues, are often fleeting and unreliable. Whether it’s the fear of failure, the discomfort of change, or the temptation of instant gratification, emotions can cloud judgment and derail long-term goals.

Munsey insists that while emotions are inevitable, they should not be the driving force behind important decisions. Instead of waiting for motivation or “feeling ready,” successful individuals take action despite their emotional state. The key is recognizing when your emotions are leading you astray and learning to detach from them to make more objective, rational choices.

Takeaway: Stop waiting for the perfect emotional state to act. You don’t need to feel confident, motivated, or inspired to make progress. The ability to act in the face of doubt and discomfort is what separates successful people from those who stagnate.

2. Mental Toughness is a Skill, Not a Trait

A large part of Munsey’s philosophy is centered on the idea that mental toughness isn’t something you’re born with—it’s a skill that can be developed. By deliberately pushing yourself beyond your comfort zone and practicing self-discipline, you can train your mind to endure discomfort and keep going, even when your feelings are telling you to stop.

Building mental resilience requires consistent effort and a willingness to challenge yourself. Whether it’s a tough workout, a challenging project at work, or resisting the urge to procrastinate, every time you push through difficulty, you’re training your mind to become stronger.

Takeaway: Mental toughness is like a muscle—the more you use it, the stronger it gets. Challenge yourself regularly by doing things that make you uncomfortable, and over time, you’ll become more resilient in the face of adversity.

3. Stop Relying on Motivation

Munsey makes it clear that motivation is fickle. It comes and goes, often when you least expect it. Waiting for motivation to strike before taking action is a surefire way to remain stagnant. Instead, Munsey emphasizes the importance of systems and habits over motivation.

Successful people don’t rely on motivation; they create systems and routines that ensure they stay on track, regardless of how they feel. By focusing on building strong habits, you can make progress consistently, even on days when motivation is nowhere to be found.

Takeaway: Design your life around systems, not motivation. Create daily habits that move you toward your goals, and stick to them, whether you feel like it or not.

4. Discomfort is Your Friend

One of the most important concepts in Fck Your Feelings* is that discomfort is essential for growth. Munsey argues that growth only happens when we push beyond our comfort zones. This is where true transformation occurs—when you’re willing to endure discomfort in the short term for the sake of long-term success.

By embracing discomfort, you can train yourself to do hard things without hesitation. Whether it’s making a difficult decision, having a tough conversation, or pushing through physical pain in the gym, discomfort is the price you pay for progress.

Takeaway: Learn to embrace discomfort as a necessary part of growth. The more you practice enduring difficult situations, the easier it becomes to tackle challenges in the future.

5. The Power of Self-Discipline

At the core of Munsey’s philosophy is self-discipline—the ability to do what needs to be done, even when you don’t feel like it. While self-doubt and negative emotions are inevitable, discipline allows you to stay consistent in your actions. Munsey believes that self-discipline is the foundation of success in any area of life, whether it’s business, fitness, or personal growth.

Self-discipline is not about being harsh on yourself, but about setting clear standards for your behavior and sticking to them. It’s about being proactive, taking ownership of your actions, and committing to long-term goals, even when the process is uncomfortable.

Takeaway: Cultivating self-discipline is essential for achieving success. Focus on creating small, daily disciplines that align with your bigger goals, and commit to them, no matter how you feel.

6. Focus on What You Can Control

Munsey highlights the importance of focusing on what you can control rather than being overwhelmed by external factors. Many people let uncontrollable circumstances dictate their emotions and actions, leading to frustration and helplessness.

By shifting focus to what you can control—your mindset, your actions, and your responses—you can take back your power and create real change in your life. Munsey emphasizes the importance of personal responsibility and not allowing excuses to justify inaction.

Takeaway: Take ownership of your life by focusing on what you can control. Stop wasting energy on things beyond your influence, and instead direct your effort toward actions that move you closer to your goals.

Final Thoughts

Fck Your Feelings* is a hard-hitting, practical guide for anyone looking to break free from the limitations of emotional decision-making and develop mental toughness. Munsey’s advice may be tough to hear, but it’s exactly the kind of direct, no-nonsense wisdom that’s needed to achieve real, lasting change. If you’re ready to stop letting your feelings control your life and start making disciplined, deliberate choices, this book is for you.

While the tone may be blunt, the lessons are invaluable: stop relying on motivation, embrace discomfort, and take full responsibility for your actions. As Munsey makes clear, mastering your mind is the key to achieving greatness.

Almighty Allah vs Karma, Jinx, and Nazzar (Evil Eye)

Throughout human history, people have tried to make sense of the forces that shape their lives. For us as Muslims, our understanding of destiny, protection, and success is anchored in faith in Allah (Subhanahu wa ta’ala) power and wisdom. Yet, in daily life, many turn to ideas like Karma, Jinx, or Nazzar (the Evil Eye) to explain misfortunes or successes. These concepts are not from Islam; they’re often rooted in misunderstandings or borrowed from other belief systems. My goal in this article is to explain why true peace and resilience come from relying on Allah Subhanahu wa ta’ala alone and not on these human created myths.

From the start, we’ve been given examples of Allah (swt) wisdom and authority. Shaytaan was one of the first beings to defy Allah (swt), refusing to honor Adam (AS). This act of pride led to Shaytaan’s downfall, showing us what happens to those who turn away from Allah (swt) commands. Over time, Allah (swt) justice has unfolded through various generations, as seen with the destruction of communities in the time of Prophet Noah (AS) and the people of Prophet Lut (AS). Back then, the punishment was immediate; people saw the consequences of disobedience right before their eyes.

Today, however, Allah (swt) allows us more time to choose our paths and reflect. But even with this patience, Allah (swt) attributes remain: He is still the All-Powerful, the Most Merciful, and the Best Planner. As the Quran says, He alone is responsible for the fate of all creation:

To Allah belongs the dominion of the heavens and the earth, and whatever is within them. He has power over all things.
(Quran 5:120)

And Allah is the best of planners. (Quran 3:54)

He created the heavens and the earth in truth and formed you and perfected your forms; and to Him is the [final] destination.
(Quran 64:3)

In our fast-paced world, however, we often overlook these verses. Instead, we begin to rely on concepts like Karma, Jinx, or Nazzar (Evil Eye) to explain events. But why? These beliefs give a sense of immediate cause and effect, an illusion of control over what happens to us. Yet, believing in such ideas inadvertently diminishes our faith in Allah’s ultimate plan and protection.

Why Allah (swt) Power Surpasses Karma, Jinx, and Nazzar (Evil Eye)

Allah (swt) wisdom and justice encompass everything, including what we understand and what we don’t. When we believe in Allah (swt) alone, we don’t need explanations like Karma or Jinx because we know that everything is part of His divine plan. Allah (swt) doesn’t rely on luck or fate in the way humans might think; His wisdom is beyond any human comprehension.

Consider Pharaoh, as mentioned in the Quran. He was wealthy and powerful, ruling with an iron fist and enslaving his people. Some might even view him as a “successful” ruler by worldly standards, yet his arrogance led him to defy Allah (swt), even claiming divinity. Despite his immense power, he met his end in the Red Sea, where Allah (swt) preserved his body as a lasting reminder of what happens to those who rebel against His commands. Pharaoh’s fate is a profound lesson that no one, no matter how strong or influential, can challenge Allah (swt) authority.

As the Quran says:

This day We shall preserve your body, that you may become a sign to those who come after you! But verily, many among mankind are heedless of Our signs. (Quran 10:92)

If Pharaoh lived in our times, he might be considered one of the most cruel powerful figures in the world, a leader with seemingly unlimited control. Yet, even with all his influence, he was defeated by Allah (swt), his body left as a warning to humanity. This demonstrates an essential truth: no amount of wealth, power, or influence can stand against Allah (swt) will. Truly, no human, no matter the era or “universe” could ever match Allah (swt) might.

Why Do People Believe in Karma, Jinx, and Nazzar?

Karma, Jinx, and Nazzar (Evil Eye) are appealing because they seem to explain the things we don’t understand. Karma promises that “what goes around, comes around,” while Jinx and the Evil Eye imply that someone else’s jealousy or negativity can bring harm. But these concepts ultimately rely on a worldview that Allah (swt) wisdom and protection overrule. When we put our trust in Allah (swt), we recognize that nothing happens without His permission. No amount of envy, “bad luck,” or supposed curse can harm us if Allah (swt) does not will it.

In the Quran, Allah (swt) reassures us of His protection:

And if Allah should touch you with adversity, there is no remover of it except Him; and if He intends for you good, then there is no repeller of His bounty. (Quran 10:107)

This verse is a powerful reminder that Allah (swt) alone controls what happens to us. Believing in anything else is a form of shirk, or associating others with Allah (swt) power, which is a grave sin. When we start to place our faith in Karma, Jinx, or Nazzar (Evil Eye), we lose sight of Allah (swt) role as our protector and guide.

Building a Mindset of Tawakkul (Trust in Allah)

So, what does it mean to fully place our trust in Allah (swt)? It means that we recognize His wisdom in every situation, even when we don’t understand it. Practicing tawakkul, or reliance on Allah (swt), frees us from the anxiety and fear that come with beliefs in Karma or the Evil Eye. If something difficult happens, we know it is a test from Allah (swt). If we achieve success, we thank Allah (swt) for His blessings. This mindset is incredibly powerful because it removes the need to control every detail of our lives, giving us peace and contentment.

One practical way to practice tawakkul is through gratitude and humility. Each time we accomplish something, we should say, “Masha’Allah,” recognizing that Allah (swt) is the source of our success. Instead of thinking, “I earned this entirely by my own effort,” we can say, “Alhamdulillah, Allah (swt) blessed me with this opportunity.” Gratitude not only humbles us but also serves as a shield against envy or negativity from others.

Trust in Allah (swt): The Path to Inner Peace

Many of the anxieties we face today stem from a lack of trust in Allah (swt). When we put faith in concepts like Karma or Jinx, we open ourselves to needless worry. “Will my success bring bad luck?” “Is someone giving me the Evil Eye?” These questions only arise when we forget that Allah (swt) is our protector.

Here’s a practical approach to letting go of these fears:

  1. Constantly Remember Allah (swt): Keep Allah (swt) in your heart and mind throughout the day. Recite “Bismillah” when starting anything, and thank Allah often.
  2. Believe in Divine Wisdom: Remind yourself that Allah (swt) knows best, even when situations seem difficult. Trusting in His wisdom helps us accept His will, regardless of the circumstances.
  3. Practice Gratitude: Saying “Alhamdulillah” or “Masha’Allah” for blessings keeps us grounded and reminds us of Allah (swt) mercy.
  4. Pray for Protection: When you feel anxious about the Evil Eye or other fears, pray sincerely. The Quran tells us that Allah (swt) is our best protector: “And Allah is the best of protectors, and He is the Most Merciful of the merciful.” (Quran 12:64)
  5. Read the Quran and Seek Guidance: The Quran is filled with verses that bring comfort and wisdom, reminding us of Allah (swt) power. Regularly reading the Quran strengthens our faith and reinforces our reliance on Allah (swt).

Conclusion: Allah (swt) Alone is Sufficient

Ultimately, our lives and destinies are in Allah (swt) hands, not in the hands of concepts like Karma, Jinx, or Nazzar (Evil Eye). When we deepen our faith in Allah (swt) and turn to Him for guidance, we are no longer bound by superstitions or unfounded fears. Placing our trust in Allah (swt) above all else allows us to live with purpose, peace, and gratitude. The more we rely on Him, the more we can let go of beliefs that weaken our faith. Insha’Allah, may we all strive to remember that Allah (swt) is our protector, our guide, and the source of all blessings.


Note:

“Allah” is the Arabic word for God, referring to the One and only God.

“Subhanahu wa ta’ala” (SWT) is an Arabic phrase that translates to “The most glorified, the most high”. It is a Muslim honorific used to refer to God.

“Nazzar” is an Urdu term that translates to the “Evil Eye” or “Black Eye” in English. It refers to the belief that envious or negative energy from others can bring harm or misfortune. However, as explained, our faith in Allah’s protection and wisdom is far greater than any superstition, reinforcing that we are under His watchful care alone.

Action Figures Come to Life: The Art of Toy Photography

Jared Middleton, also known as SirDork730 on Instagram, dedicates hours to meticulously crafting action figure scenes with real-world environments and small firework effects to produce stunning action photographs.

Jared, 26 (as of the video published on March 22, 2019) from New York, began photographing action figures as a hobby in 2013. He admits that his early attempts “looked like complete garbage,” with basic poses of figures shooting at each other. However, through persistence and trial and error, he refined his skills and eventually produced stunning results.

Photo Gear He Uses:

“I use a Canon EOS Rebel with an 18-55mm lens. I don’t use any flash, but I use flashlights and natural lighting. I keep my shutter speed as fast as possible to capture the explosions. I bring a couple different tripods for filming as well as the photographing. That’s about it!”

Where I Find Free Books to Read Online and Offline

If you’re like me and love to read, finding quality books for free can feel like hitting the jackpot. Thanks to both online resources and traditional methods, it’s easier than ever to access great literature without spending a dime. Whether you’re into timeless classics, contemporary fiction, or just enjoy the feel of a physical book, I’ve put together a guide to where I find free books both online and offline. These are my personal recommendations, based on my own experience.

Where I Find Free Books Online

With the abundance of digital resources available, getting free eBooks is simple and convenient. Below are my favorite sites where you can download or read books online without spending a penny.

1. Project Gutenberg

One of my go-to sources for free eBooks is Project Gutenberg. It’s a massive collection of over 60,000 books, mostly older works that have entered the public domain. If you love classics, this is where you’ll find plenty of them for free.

Link: Project Gutenberg

2. Open Library

Open Library is another favorite of mine. It’s part of the Internet Archive, and its mission is to have “a web page for every book ever published.” I love that they offer millions of books in various formats, from public domain works to more modern books that you can borrow for free.

Link: Open Library

3. Google Books

While not everything on Google Books is free, I’ve found plenty of public domain books that are fully accessible. It’s a great place to browse through older titles, and you can read them right in your browser without having to download any special software.

Link: Google Books

4. Smashwords

For those who enjoy discovering indie authors and self-published works, Smashwords is a gem. I often browse through their thousands of free eBooks, which cover a wide range of genres. If you’re into romance, sci-fi, or even poetry, you’ll definitely find something to suit your taste here.

Link: Smashwords

5. ManyBooks

ManyBooks is another site I frequent when I’m looking for free eBooks. It has a clean interface and offers thousands of books in different genres. Many of their titles are sourced from Project Gutenberg, but they make it easier to browse and download.

Link: ManyBooks

6. BookBub

I’m a huge fan of BookBub, especially because they notify me about free and discounted eBooks across popular platforms like Amazon Kindle, Apple Books, and more. It’s perfect if you want to keep up with the latest deals and freebies without constantly searching.

Link: BookBub Free Books

7. Wattpad

If you’re into discovering up-and-coming authors like I am, Wattpad is worth exploring. While most of the content is original, there are plenty of free stories in every genre imaginable, from romance to thriller. It’s a fun platform to find fresh talent.

Link: Wattpad

8. Standard Ebooks

For those who, like me, appreciate well-formatted eBooks, Standard Ebooks is a fantastic resource. They take public domain books and turn them into beautifully crafted digital editions that are a pleasure to read on any device.

Link: Standard Ebooks

9. Amazon Free Kindle Books

Amazon’s collection of free Kindle books is another reliable resource I use. While you’ll need a Kindle device or the Kindle app, there’s a huge selection of free public domain works, as well as some promotional freebies.

Link: Amazon Free Kindle Books


My Tips for Enjoying Free Books Online:

  • Use your library: Many public libraries offer free digital borrowing services through apps like Libby or OverDrive. I’ve borrowed plenty of eBooks from my local library this way.
  • Check book formats: Make sure the eBook format works with your device, whether it’s PDF, ePub, or Kindle.
  • Stay legal: Stick to public domain books or those released under open licenses to avoid pirated content.

These online resources have given me access to a wealth of books I can enjoy anytime. Now, let’s move on to how I find free physical books.

Where I Find Free Books Offline

While digital platforms make it easy to access books online, sometimes there’s nothing quite like holding a physical book in your hands. If you’re like me and still enjoy the traditional way of reading, there are several ways to find free books offline as well. Here are some of the best places I’ve discovered to score physical books for free.

1. Public Libraries

Your local public library is one of the best places to find free books. Many libraries have extensive collections of both fiction and non-fiction, and they’re constantly adding new titles. The great thing is, you can borrow books for a few weeks at a time, and in some cases, libraries hold regular book sales or giveaways.

Tip: Many libraries also have partnerships with other libraries, so if your branch doesn’t have a book, they might be able to get it for you through interlibrary loans.

2. Little Free Libraries

Little Free Libraries are small, community-run book exchanges that have popped up all over the world. These are usually small wooden boxes set up in neighborhoods where anyone can take a book or leave a book. I love stumbling upon one while out and about because you never know what gems you might find. You can search for Little Free Library locations near you on their official website.

Link: Little Free Library Locations

3. Book Swaps

Book swaps are another excellent way to find free books. Many communities, workplaces, or even coffee shops host informal book exchange programs. You can bring in books you no longer need and swap them for something new. Some events are one-off, while others are recurring, giving you plenty of opportunities to refresh your reading pile.

Tip: Keep an eye out for book swap events at local community centers or schools, as these often pop up during the year.

4. Freecycle and Craigslist

If you’re open to browsing online communities but still want physical books, sites like Freecycle and Craigslist are great for finding free stuff in your area, including books. People often give away books when they’re moving or decluttering, and you can easily snag a few boxes of free books this way.

Link: Freecycle

5. Thrift Stores and Used Bookstores (Free Book Sections)

While most thrift stores and used bookstores focus on selling their items, some of them also feature sections dedicated to free books, particularly older editions or overstocked titles that they need to clear out. I’ve noticed that smaller, independent stores are often more likely to offer a “free bin” where they leave books for customers to take at no cost, or they host periodic free book giveaways or special events. It’s always worth asking the staff if they have any books they’re giving away, as these opportunities aren’t always advertised. Even when free books aren’t available, I’ve managed to purchase great reads for as little as $2, making these stores a budget-friendly option for building your personal library. Don’t overlook these hidden gems—you never know what treasures you might find!

6. Garage Sales

While garage sales are typically places where people sell their items, many sellers include free bins to clear out what they don’t want to bring back inside. Books are often found in these bins, especially if the seller is moving or just decluttering. I’ve had great luck picking up books this way, and you never know what kind of unique finds you might come across.

7. University or School Book Giveaways

If you live near a university or school, they often clear out old books to make room for new materials. These book giveaways can happen at the end of a semester or during renovation periods. Universities sometimes give away outdated textbooks, academic papers, or library copies that are no longer needed.

Tip: Keep an eye on university bulletin boards or websites for any notices about upcoming book giveaways.

My Tips for Finding Free Books Offline:

  • Network with friends: Sometimes your friends and family might have books they’re willing to part with. Consider organizing a small book swap among your circle.
  • Check for local events: Look out for local festivals, community events, or literacy programs. These often have book giveaways or free book fairs.
  • Be patient: Finding free books offline can take time, but if you’re consistent, you’ll build a great collection of books to read.

By combining both online and offline methods, I’ve been able to build an extensive reading list without spending money. Whether you’re a fan of classic literature, contemporary indie works, or just like browsing through used books, these resources offer plenty of opportunities to enjoy reading for free. Happy reading!

Another thing to add

I’ve donated all the books I’ve already read to my local library instead of shelving them, because I believe it’s better for others to enjoy them rather than having them collect dust on my shelves. Donating is a meaningful way for me to give back to my community and share the joy those books brought me. I understand that libraries often depend on donations to grow their collections, especially when budgets are limited. By contributing my books, I’m helping to provide greater access to knowledge, entertainment, and education for everyone. It’s also a sustainable way for me to know my books will be put to good use rather than going to waste. It’s a small gesture that makes a meaningful difference, and it feels good to know my books will continue to inspire others.

Why I Love Maamoul with Dates and a Cup of Tea

Maamoul with dates has always been a personal favorite of mine, and when paired with a warm cup of tea, it becomes something I truly look forward to. There’s a certain comfort and joy that comes with this simple treat, and here’s why I find it so special.

1. The Perfect Sweetness

What I love most about maamoul with dates is its natural sweetness. The dates inside bring a rich, caramel-like flavor that isn’t too overpowering. Unlike sugary desserts, the sweetness of dates feels wholesome and satisfying. When I bite into that buttery, crumbly pastry and reach the soft date filling, it’s like a little piece of heaven.

2. A Relaxing Ritual

Pairing it with a cup of tea makes it even better. The slightly bitter or earthy taste of the tea balances out the sweetness of the dates perfectly. For me, sitting down with maamoul and tea is more than just a snack—it’s a moment to slow down and enjoy a peaceful break in my day. Whether it’s black tea, green tea, or even herbal tea, the combination feels calming and indulgent.

3. A Healthier Treat

Another reason I love maamoul with dates is that it feels like a healthier treat. Dates are naturally rich in fiber, vitamins, and minerals like potassium and magnesium, so I don’t feel too guilty indulging in a few. It’s a dessert that nourishes both body and soul.

4. Tied to Tradition

There’s also something nostalgic about maamoul with dates. I grew up with this pastry being a staple during special occasions like Eid, but now it’s become a year-round favorite. It’s tied to my culture and traditions, and each bite feels like a small connection to home, no matter where I am.

In the end, the combination of maamoul with dates and tea is about comfort, balance, and a little bit of nostalgia. It’s the kind of snack that makes me pause, appreciate the moment, and enjoy something delicious and meaningful. If you haven’t tried it yet, I definitely recommend these two brands down below:

How Joe Foss’s Story Deepened My American Pride

There are books that entertain, books that inform, and then there are books that resonate so deeply that they influence your perspective on life. A Proud American: The Autobiography of Joe Foss falls into that latter category for me. This book isn’t just a historical account of one man’s extraordinary life—it’s a testament to the strength of character, courage, and resilience that are fundamental to the American spirit. Reading Joe Foss’s story didn’t just fill me with admiration for his accomplishments; it inspired me to reflect on my own journey as a Muslim Pakistani American and what it means to truly embody the ideals of this country.

The Story of a True American Hero

Joe Foss’s life is a powerful reminder of what it means to be a hero, not in the superficial sense we sometimes see today, but in the truest, most selfless sense. Foss risked his life during World War II, not for fame or recognition, but because of his love for his country and his comrades. The bravery he displayed in the skies over Guadalcanal, where he earned the Medal of Honor, speaks to a kind of courage that’s rare and admirable. But it wasn’t just his military career that affected me—it was the way he continued to serve his country afterward, becoming a successful governor and playing a key role in founding the American Football League.

As someone who moved to the U.S. and eventually became an American citizen, I found Foss’s story to be deeply moving. It reminded me of the values this country is built upon: sacrifice, hard work, and an unyielding commitment to doing what is right. His life is a reminder that true patriotism is not about grandstanding, but about contributing to the welfare of your fellow citizens, whether that’s through service in the military, leadership in public office, or simply living with integrity.

A Reflection on What it Means to Be American

Joe Foss’s story had a profound effect on how I view my own American identity. As someone who proudly identifies as Muslim, Pakistani, and American, I often reflect on what it means to be part of this great nation. Reading A Proud American reminded me that being American is not about where you come from, but about what you stand for. It’s about resilience, grit, and standing up for what’s right even when it’s difficult. Foss exemplified those qualities throughout his life, and his story inspired me to think more critically about how I can contribute to the country I now call home.

The book also made me appreciate the freedoms and opportunities that the U.S. offers. Foss’s life was a testament to the American Dream—he grew up in South Dakota, became a decorated war hero, and went on to lead both in politics and sports. His story is a reminder that in America, your background doesn’t define your future. It’s the choices you make, the risks you take, and the dedication you show that define you. This idea has deeply influenced my approach to life here in the U.S., encouraging me to pursue my goals with the same tenacity and determination that Foss showed throughout his life.

A Call to Live with Purpose and Integrity

What stood out most to me about Joe Foss’s story was his unwavering sense of purpose and integrity. Whether he was leading men into battle or governing a state, Foss approached every challenge with the same level of commitment and honor. His humility, despite his numerous achievements, was one of the most inspiring aspects of the book. In a time when recognition and self-promotion often take center stage, Foss’s life serves as a reminder that true greatness comes from living with purpose, not seeking praise.

This idea of living with purpose resonated with me personally. It reminded me to reflect on how I can serve my community and make a positive impact in my own way. Whether it’s through my work, my interactions with others, or my efforts to promote understanding between cultures, Foss’s story encouraged me to think about the legacy I want to leave behind as a proud American.

How This Book Strengthened My Love for America

The Proud American didn’t just impact my view of heroism and patriotism—it deepened my love for the country I now call home. Reading about Joe Foss’s sacrifices and his love for America reminded me of how fortunate I am to live in a country where freedom, democracy, and opportunity are upheld. His life story reaffirmed my belief in the principles that make America great, and it inspired me to carry those values forward in my own life.

As someone who moved to the U.S. as a teenager, I often reflect on the contrast between where I came from and the opportunities that being in America has afforded me. Joe Foss’s story solidified my appreciation for those opportunities and reminded me that being American means embracing responsibility, hard work, and service to others. It also made me think about how I can live up to those ideals, especially as someone who comes from a different cultural and religious background. Joe Foss’s life taught me that no matter who you are or where you come from, you can contribute to the betterment of this nation through hard work and integrity.

A Proud American: The Autobiography of Joe FossA Proud American: The Autobiography of Joe Foss by Foss
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

A Proud American: The Autobiography of Joe Foss is more than just an autobiography—it’s an inspiration. It’s a story of true heroism, patriotism, and the kind of values that define America at its core.

For me, this book was a reminder of the blessings of freedom, the power of resilience, and the importance of living with integrity. Joe Foss’s life has inspired me to reflect on my own role as an American, and how I can honor the legacy of those who came before me by contributing to the country I love.

Reading this book has strengthened my sense of pride in being an American, and it has reaffirmed my commitment to living a life guided by purpose, humility, and service to others—just like Joe Foss did.

View all my reviews on Goodreads

Why I Am Proud to Be a Muslim Pakistani American

I was born in Pakistan and moved to the United States in 90s when Bill Clinton was President. I was a teenager, attending Thomas Jefferson Middle School in Valparaiso, Indiana. (You can do the math to figure out how old I am now.) Although I’ve spent more years of my life in the U.S., my time in Valparaiso holds unforgettable memories. My middle school science teachers, Mr. Handley and Mrs. Dolezal, taught me “The Pledge of Allegiance.” The day I became a U.S. citizen and later learned the national anthem, I felt immense pride in being American. My journey as a Muslim Pakistani American has shaped who I am today.

Rooted in Heritage

My Pakistani roots remind me of where I come from—a land of rich traditions, history, and vibrant culture. Pakistan has always been a source of pride for me. Its poets, thinkers, and freedom fighters inspire my love for knowledge and justice. Growing up surrounded by Urdu poetry, delicious food, and deep family ties, I carry with me a love for my heritage that keeps me connected to my origins, even while living far from them.

Faith as a Guiding Light

Islam is an integral part of my life. It provides me with a moral compass, guiding my decisions and actions. My faith emphasizes compassion, humility, and service to others. As a Muslim, I’m part of a global community that shares these values, and it reminds me to practice darguzar—to let go and forgive, a principle that I strive to live by daily. Islam teaches me to be patient and kind, to value learning and equality, and to be proud of my identity in a world that often challenges it.

American Spirit

Becoming a U.S. citizen was one of the proudest moments of my life. America, the land of opportunity, welcomed me with open arms. My education in Valparaiso, Indiana as well as California gave me not only academic knowledge but also lessons in tolerance, unity, and civic duty. Learning “The Pledge of Allegiance” and the national anthem made me appreciate the freedoms and responsibilities that come with being American. The U.S. Constitution’s promise of liberty and justice for all resonates deeply with my belief in fairness and equality.

Living a Dual Identity

The fusion of being Pakistani and American provides me with a broadened perspective. I’ve had the chance to experience life in two vastly different cultures, which has shaped me into a more empathetic and open-minded individual. As an immigrant, I learned to balance both worlds, finding strength in my differences while contributing to the vibrant fabric of American society.

Representing Diversity

As a Muslim Pakistani American, I represent the diversity that makes the United States so remarkable. My identity challenges stereotypes and demonstrates that Americans come from various walks of life, faiths, and ethnicities. I’m proud to be a living testament to the idea that one can be both proudly Muslim and passionately American, without compromising either.

A Future of Hope and Possibilities

Being Muslim, Pakistani, and American gives me hope for the future. My identity is dynamic—it evolves with the times while staying rooted in the values I hold dear. It allows me to contribute to my community, stand for social justice, and promote understanding between different cultures.

Why I Am Proud to Be American

Freedom and Opportunity

One of the most profound reasons I’m proud to be an American is the freedom this country offers. The United States is built on the idea that anyone, regardless of where they come from, can achieve their dreams through hard work and determination. I’ve experienced this firsthand. From attending school in Indiana to earning my citizenship, I’ve been given the tools and opportunities to shape my own future. The American Dream isn’t just an abstract concept; it’s a reality that I live and continue to strive for.

The ability to pursue a career, access quality education, and express my opinions without fear of persecution is something I deeply value. The freedom to speak, worship, and live according to my beliefs is a privilege I hold dear, especially as someone coming from a different cultural and religious background. This country has given me the space to practice my faith freely while also being part of the diverse American society.

Civic Pride and Democracy

What makes America stand out is its commitment to democracy. The idea that the people have a voice in their government is incredibly empowering. I take pride in participating in elections, knowing that my vote counts and that my voice contributes to the shaping of policies that affect the entire nation. This democratic system is a foundation for freedom, equality, and justice, and I’m proud to be part of a nation where power rests with the people.

Learning “The Pledge of Allegiance” in middle school was my first introduction to this concept. The words “liberty and justice for all” resonated deeply with me. As I grew older, I realized how much sacrifice and effort went into preserving these ideals. Being American means upholding these values and recognizing that, while the system isn’t perfect, we have the ability to push for positive change through peaceful and democratic means.

Cultural Melting Pot

The diversity of the U.S. is another source of pride for me. As a country built by immigrants, America is a melting pot of cultures, religions, and traditions. This diversity has allowed me to stay connected to my Pakistani roots while also embracing American culture. I can celebrate Eid and also enjoy Thanksgiving—this blend of cultures is what makes America special. The acceptance of different ways of life, the respect for various backgrounds, and the celebration of multiculturalism are deeply ingrained in American society.

America’s diversity has taught me tolerance and acceptance. I’ve met people from all walks of life, and we’ve shared our stories, cultures, and experiences. This exchange of ideas and traditions is a hallmark of the American experience and one that I’m incredibly proud of.

Resilience and Progress

America’s history is one of resilience and constant progress. From the fight for independence to the civil rights movement, this nation has a long tradition of overcoming challenges and pushing toward a more just and inclusive society. As an American, I’m proud of the strides we’ve made and continue to make in addressing issues of inequality and injustice.

This drive for progress, equality, and freedom is what defines the American spirit. It is a nation constantly evolving, learning from its mistakes, and striving to do better. The resilience of the American people in the face of adversity is something that inspires me. Whether it’s recovering from economic downturns, standing together in the wake of tragedies, or fighting for the rights of the marginalized, America continues to move forward, and I’m proud to be part of that ongoing journey.

The Spirit of Innovation

The U.S. is renowned for its innovation, creativity, and advancements in science, technology, and the arts. Being American means being part of a nation that encourages bold ideas and groundbreaking discoveries. The freedom to think outside the box, to challenge the status quo, and to pioneer new paths is something that defines the American ethos. This spirit of innovation has led to life-changing inventions, technological breakthroughs, and cultural revolutions that have shaped the modern world.

As a Pakistani American, I appreciate how the U.S. encourages individuals from all backgrounds to contribute to its advancements. From Silicon Valley to medical research, the possibilities are endless, and it’s exciting to be part of a country that not only fosters but celebrates innovation.

Commitment to Justice and Equality

While the U.S. is not without its flaws, one thing I admire is its ongoing commitment to justice and equality. The nation’s foundation rests on the ideals of “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness” for all its citizens, and this commitment has been tested and strengthened over the years. As an American, I’m proud of the progress that’s been made toward ensuring that everyone, regardless of race, religion, or background, has a fair shot at achieving their dreams.

America’s legal and civil rights system, while imperfect, continues to evolve toward greater inclusivity and fairness. Being part of a country that actively works to live up to its ideals inspires me to contribute to that mission of justice for all.

Spicy Beef Curry: A Flavorful Journey Without Yogurt, Garlic, or Ginger

When it comes to cooking a classic beef curry, most recipes will tell you that yogurt, garlic, and ginger are essential ingredients for a rich, balanced flavor. But what happens when you don’t have them on hand? This is exactly what happened to me today when I was about to cook lunch. I found myself cooking without yogurt, garlic, or ginger simply because I didn’t have them at home—and to my surprise, the result was still absolutely delicious!

In my Ammi’s kitchen, I love experimenting with spices and ingredients, and one of my proudest creations is this spicy beef curry made without those “yogurt, garlic and ginger” ingredients. You might think that skipping them would leave the dish lacking, but I’ve found that with the right techniques and some creative adjustments, you can still create a vibrant, mouthwatering curry.

The Base: Onion & Tomato Magic

Since I was missing garlic and ginger, I relied heavily on onions and tomatoes to form the base of the curry. I started by sautéing finely chopped onions until they turned golden brown, which is crucial for adding sweetness and depth. Then, I added chopped tomatoes. As they cooked down, they released a natural tanginess, which worked well to replace the usual yogurt’s role in balancing the heat of the spices.

The Spices: The Real Stars of the Show

Spices are where the magic happens. Even without garlic and ginger, I used cumin seeds, bay leaves, cinnamon, cardamom, and cloves to bring warmth and aroma to the dish. These whole spices, along with ground turmeric, coriander, cumin, and red chili powder, provided the bold, spicy character of the curry. Since garlic and ginger were missing, I made sure to bloom the spices properly, ensuring they unlocked their full potential. The cumin and coriander added earthiness, while the red chili powder brought a fiery punch.

I also added green chilies early on, which worked alongside the tomatoes to give the curry a fresh, fiery kick. Finally, I finished it off with a sprinkle of garam masala, which added complexity and warmth to the dish.

Cooking the Beef: Slow & Steady Wins the Race

I used chunks of beef in the curry, which absorbed the spicy gravy as they cooked. Patience was key here, as slow simmering made the beef wonderfully tender. After browning the meat with the spice base, I let it simmer slowly, allowing the flavors to penetrate every bite. The longer it simmers, the better the result, and I love how the beef transforms in texture and flavor.

Final Touches

To finish, I garnished the curry with fresh cilantro, which added a hint of brightness and contrast to the rich, spiced sauce. Sometimes, I serve it with a wedge of lemon for those who enjoy a citrusy zing.

Recipe: Spicy Beef Curry Without Yogurt, Garlic, or Ginger

Here’s my spicy beef curry recipe when I’m missing these so-called essentials (yogurt, garlic and ginger) but still want a rich, spicy beef curry:

Ingredients:

  • 500g beef, cut into bite-sized cubes
  • 2 large onions, finely chopped
  • 3 medium tomatoes, chopped
  • 2-3 green chilies, slit (adjust according to heat preference)
  • 1 tsp cumin seeds
  • 1-2 bay leaves
  • 1 cinnamon stick (1-inch piece)
  • 3-4 cloves
  • 2-3 cardamom pods
  • 1 tsp turmeric powder
  • 1 tsp red chili powder (adjust to taste)
  • 2 tsp coriander powder
  • 1 tsp cumin powder
  • ½ tsp garam masala
  • Salt to taste
  • 2 tbsp oil or ghee
  • Fresh cilantro leaves for garnish
  • Lemon wedges (optional)

Instructions:

  1. Heat Oil: In a large pan, heat oil or ghee over medium heat. Add cumin seeds, bay leaves, cinnamon stick, cloves, and cardamom pods. Sauté for a minute until fragrant.
  2. Add Onions: Add finely chopped onions and cook until they turn golden brown. This step is important to develop the rich base flavor of the curry.
  3. Add Tomatoes & Chilies: Stir in chopped tomatoes and green chilies. Cook until the tomatoes soften and the oil starts to separate from the mixture. This creates the tangy sauce that replaces the yogurt’s balancing effect.
  4. Add Spices: Add turmeric, red chili powder, coriander powder, and cumin powder. Cook the spices for 2-3 minutes to release their flavors and aromas.
  5. Cook Beef: Add the beef pieces to the pan and stir well to coat them in the spice mixture. Cook the beef for about 5 minutes, browning it on all sides.
  6. Simmer: Pour in enough water to cover the beef. Bring it to a boil, then lower the heat. Cover and simmer for 1-1.5 hours, stirring occasionally, until the beef is tender. Add more water if necessary.
  7. Finish with Garam Masala: Once the beef is tender and the gravy has thickened, sprinkle garam masala and adjust salt if needed. Cook for another 5 minutes.
  8. Garnish: Garnish with fresh cilantro leaves and serve with rice, naan, or roti. For an extra kick, serve with lemon wedges on the side.

And there you have it—a hearty, spicy beef curry that proves you don’t need yogurt, garlic, or ginger to make an unforgettable dish. Despite cooking without them because I didn’t have them at home, the curry turned out vibrant, flavorful, and satisfying. So, the next time you find yourself missing these “must-have” ingredients, just remember that creativity and the right spices can still deliver amazing results!

How I Learned to Stay Calm and Be More Upfront When I Don’t Like Something or Go With the Best “Durguzar”

In life, we often encounter situations that make us uncomfortable, frustrated, or even upset. For many years, I struggled with how to handle these moments. I either kept my feelings to myself, leading to pent-up resentment, or expressed them too late and too harshly. Finding the balance between staying calm and being upfront when I didn’t like something was not easy. However, through self-reflection, practice, and some effective techniques, I managed to develop a healthier approach.

Acknowledging the Need for Change

I realized the need for change after experiencing repeated situations where avoiding confrontation only led to stress and strained relationships. Whether it was staying silent when someone made an offhand comment or agreeing to things I wasn’t comfortable with, the internal pressure built up over time. I would go over conversations in my head, thinking about what I should have said, but rarely acted on those thoughts. I came to understand that staying quiet wasn’t protecting me—it was hurting me.

This realization was a turning point. I needed to learn how to express my feelings without waiting until I was too overwhelmed to do so effectively.

Techniques to Stay Calm

One of the first steps I took was learning how to stay calm in tense moments. Here are some techniques that helped:

Mindfulness and Meditation

I started practicing mindfulness, which helped me stay present in difficult conversations. Instead of spiraling into negative thoughts or overreacting, mindfulness allowed me to observe my feelings without judgment. This made it easier to approach discussions with clarity rather than frustration.

Breathing Techniques

Breathing is simple, but incredibly powerful. I found that deep breathing exercises, particularly slow inhales and exhales, helped me calm down quickly. Whenever I felt anxiety rising, I focused on my breath, which gave me time to reset my emotions before responding.

Reading the Quran

For me, reading the Quran has been a profound source of calm and grounding. In moments of stress or uncertainty, turning to the Quran not only brings me spiritual peace but also offers guidance on how to navigate difficult situations. The messages of patience, wisdom, and kindness within the verses remind me to approach everything with a sense of balance and self-control.

Here are some Quran verses that may help you calm down and be grounded:

Surat Al-Baqarah 2 Verse 153

“O believers! Seek comfort in patience and prayer. Allah is truly with those who are patient”.

Ash-Sharh 94 Verses 5-6

“For indeed, with hardship [will be] ease. Indeed, with hardship [will be] ease”

Ghafir 40 Verse 60

“And your Lord says, ‘Call upon Me; I will respond to you'”.

Surah Ali ‘Imran 3 Verse 7

He is the One Who has revealed to you ˹O Prophet˺ the Book, of which some verses are precise—they are the foundation of the Book—while others are elusive.1 Those with deviant hearts follow the elusive verses seeking ˹to spread˺ doubt through their ˹false˺ interpretations—but none grasps their ˹full˺ meaning except Allah. As for those well-grounded in knowledge, they say, “We believe in this ˹Quran˺—it is all from our Lord.” But none will be mindful ˹of this˺ except people of reason.

Surah Ar-Rum 30 Verse 54

It is Allah Who created you in a state of weakness, then developed ˹your˺ weakness into strength, then developed ˹your˺ strength into weakness and old age.1 He creates whatever He wills. For He is the All-Knowing, Most Capable.

Hobbies and Comedy Movies

Engaging in hobbies I love, whether it’s painting, reading all sort of books, or simply being creative, helps me clear my mind and recharge. These activities give me time to reflect, helping me return to conversations with a calmer mindset.

Similarly, watching comedy movies is a favorite go-to. Humor has a way of dissolving tension and offering perspective. After a good laugh, I often find myself in a lighter mood, making it easier to be upfront in a gentle and positive way. These small joys work wonders in resetting my emotions and preparing me to approach challenging conversations with more clarity.

Pause Before Reacting

I also learned to pause. Giving myself even just a few seconds before responding allowed me to process what was happening, gather my thoughts, and avoid snapping back emotionally. The pause was key in helping me stay composed and intentional in my responses.

Learning to Communicate Assertively

With these calming techniques in place, I turned my attention to communication. I knew that staying calm wasn’t enough—I needed to be upfront about my feelings, but in a way that was constructive and clear.

Clear Communication

I realized that I had to be direct, but not aggressive. Instead of saying vague things like “I don’t know” or “It’s fine” when something bothered me, I began to practice clear and honest communication. I would say things like, “I’m uncomfortable with this,” or “I don’t agree with that,” which made my perspective clear while still being respectful.

Setting Boundaries

Setting boundaries was also a big part of this process. I used to feel guilty about saying no or expressing when something wasn’t working for me. But I learned that by setting clear boundaries, I could protect my energy and emotional well-being. This didn’t mean being rigid or inflexible, but simply ensuring that I honored my own limits.

Non-verbal Cues

I also became more aware of my non-verbal cues. Often, our tone of voice or body language can communicate just as much as words. By maintaining calm eye contact, using a neutral tone, and standing or sitting confidently, I could reinforce the message that I was being upfront in a composed way, not aggressive or defensive.

Practice Makes Perfect

Like anything, this took practice. I didn’t wake up one day suddenly able to handle every tough conversation perfectly. I started small—by expressing myself in low-stakes situations. Over time, this built my confidence. I found that as I became more comfortable, being upfront felt less like a confrontation and more like a necessary and healthy exchange.

If None of This Works: “Darguzar”—Let It Go

Despite all these techniques, sometimes the best solution is to let go. In my language, we have a word for this: “darguzar,” which means to let it go and forgive. If you’ve tried staying calm, communicating clearly, and setting boundaries but the situation remains unresolved or out of your control, it’s essential to embrace forgiveness and move forward.

Letting go doesn’t mean you’ve been defeated or that your feelings aren’t valid—it means you’re choosing peace over conflict. By practicing “darguzar,” I’ve learned that not every battle needs to be fought. There’s freedom in accepting that some things are better left behind, and with forgiveness comes emotional relief. It allows me to maintain my inner calm and focus on the things that truly matter.

The Positive Outcomes

The results of this shift have been transformative. By staying calm and being clear about my feelings, I’ve seen significant improvements in my relationships—both personal and professional. People have responded positively to my honesty, and I’ve earned more respect for standing my ground without being combative. Additionally, the anxiety that once accompanied difficult conversations has greatly diminished, leaving me with a sense of control and confidence in how I handle these situations.

Perhaps the most surprising benefit has been how this change has impacted my self-esteem. By being true to myself, setting boundaries, and speaking up calmly, I’ve grown more confident in my own voice. I no longer second-guess my feelings or question whether I should have said something. Instead, I feel empowered by knowing that I can address issues head-on without losing my composure.

At Last Statement

Learning to stay calm and be more upfront when I don’t like something has been a game-changer. It’s an ongoing journey, but one that has brought immense peace and growth into my life. If you struggle with similar issues, know that you don’t have to choose between staying silent or erupting in frustration. With mindfulness, clear communication, and a commitment to honoring your own boundaries, you can find that balance too. And if none of this works, remember the power of “darguzar”—letting go and forgiving can bring its own form of calm and closure.

Reading Broadly and Sharing Reviews on Goodreads

For the past 9 years, reading has been one of my most treasured habits. It’s more than just THAT; it’s a powerful way to expand my mind, challenge my perspectives, and engage with ideas across a broad spectrum of human thought. I find myself constantly drawn to books from different genres and disciplines, from science fiction to psychology, from history to self-development. The diverse range of subjects that I explore allows me to cultivate a deeper understanding of the world and myself. And what completes this cycle of learning and reflection is posting reviews on Goodreads.

Here’s why this habit has become an integral part of my life

Expanding Knowledge Through Variety

Reading books on a variety of topics gives me access to a wealth of knowledge. Each genre or subject brings something unique to the table. Fiction fosters creativity and empathy, history provides context to the present, psychology unveils the intricacies of the mind, and self-help offers strategies for growth. By exploring various genres, I can engage with new ideas, broaden my horizons, and make connections between seemingly unrelated topics.

For example, reading historical novels allows me to understand the socio-political fabric of a particular era, while books on neuroscience help me appreciate the inner workings of the human brain. The cross-pollination of knowledge from different fields fuels my curiosity, making each book an enriching experience. And reading diverse topics isn’t just about acquiring facts—it helps me understand different worldviews and fosters a more inclusive and well-rounded approach to life.

Engaging in Self-Reflection and Critical Thinking

Every book I read offers an opportunity to reflect on my own beliefs, values, and assumptions. Whether I agree or disagree with the author, reading often triggers introspection. A novel might make me question my relationships or lifestyle, while a nonfiction book might challenge my understanding of societal issues or scientific concepts.

By reviewing these books on Goodreads, I get a chance to articulate my thoughts and reactions. Writing reviews allows me to crystallize my ideas and engage in critical thinking. It’s not just about summarizing the book, but reflecting on how it impacted me, what I learned, and how it fits into the broader context of my intellectual journey. Each review becomes a snapshot of where I am in my thinking at a particular point in time.

Creating a Personal Learning Archive

Goodreads has become more than just a platform to share reviews; it’s a personal archive of my learning journey. When I look back at the reviews I’ve written, I can trace the evolution of my thoughts, preferences, and interests. It’s fascinating to observe how my understanding of certain topics has deepened over time or how a novel that didn’t resonate with me a year ago now holds new significance.

Writing reviews allows me to revisit books I’ve read, remember the insights I’ve gained, and sometimes even reassess them with a fresh perspective. This digital archive becomes a roadmap of my intellectual and emotional growth.

Contributing to a Community of Readers

One of the most rewarding aspects of posting reviews on Goodreads is the connection it fosters with a global community of readers. Goodreads is a space where readers come together to share their thoughts, recommendations, and insights. By posting my reviews, I’m contributing to this exchange of ideas, sparking discussions, and sometimes discovering new books based on the recommendations of others.

Sharing my thoughts on a book can also help others decide whether it’s worth their time or align with their interests. Reading other people’s reviews, in turn, offers different perspectives that I might have missed. It’s an intellectually stimulating environment that enhances my reading experience.

Accountability and Motivation

Knowing that I will write a review at the end of each book adds a layer of accountability to my reading. It encourages me to read more actively and attentively. Instead of passively consuming content, I engage more deeply with the material, knowing that I’ll need to articulate my thoughts later.

Moreover, the Goodreads community provides motivation to keep reading. Seeing friends’ updates, participating in reading challenges, and following book discussions keeps me inspired to maintain my reading habit. It’s a positive feedback loop that helps me stay connected to books and literature.

Developing Writing Skills

Writing reviews is also an excellent way to hone my writing skills. By practicing the art of summarizing complex ideas, evaluating arguments, and expressing opinions concisely, I improve my ability to communicate effectively. Each review presents a challenge: how can I convey my thoughts clearly while providing enough detail to be useful to others?

Over time, I’ve noticed that writing reviews has helped me become a better writer, not just in my Goodreads posts, but in other areas of life. Whether it’s composing emails, writing blog posts, crafting presentations, or even having discussions with friends, the clarity of thought and expression that reviewing books requires has had a ripple effect on my overall communication abilities.

Last but not least: A Journey of Lifelong Learning

Reading books across various topics and posting reviews on Goodreads is a rewarding practice that brings numerous benefits. It fosters intellectual growth, self-reflection, and community engagement. It sharpens my writing skills and helps me stay motivated in my reading habits. Most importantly, it reminds me that the journey of learning is never over; there is always another book to read, another perspective to consider, and another review to write. Through this practice, I continue to explore the world, both within and beyond the pages of a book, with a sense of curiosity and wonder.

New Photography Post

Explore my latest collection of photos, showcasing everything that catches my eye and sparks my creativity. From everyday moments to the unique and unexpected, I capture the essence of what I love and find inspiring. Each image tells its own story, reflecting the world through my lens, and offering a glimpse into the things that move me—from simple beauty to fleeting moments of wonder.

new photo added 10/12/2024

Old Photography Post

Here you’ll find a collection of photos I’ve captured using either my cellphone or an old, trusty camera. Each image reflects the simplicity and charm of moments frozen in time, proving that you don’t need the latest gear to create something meaningful. Whether taken spontaneously or with care, these shots are a testament to the beauty that can be found in the most ordinary moments, no matter the tool used to capture them.

My First Blog Post

Actually, this isn’t my first blog post—in fact, I’ve been blogging for over two decades. During this time, I’ve written extensively on a variety of topics, especially in the realm of technology. From the early days of the internet to the latest advancements in AI, cloud computing, and cybersecurity, I’ve explored countless innovations and trends. My writing journey has allowed me to witness the digital landscape’s rapid evolution firsthand, and I’ve consistently aimed to break down complex subjects into accessible content for my readers. Beyond technology, I’ve also delved into numerous trending topics that have captured global attention, ranging from lifestyle trends and social media phenomena to important issues in education and business.

This wide-ranging experience has shaped my perspective and writing style, enabling me to stay relevant and insightful in a fast-paced, ever-changing world. As technology continues to transform our lives in unprecedented ways, I remain committed to sharing informed, thoughtful posts that engage both seasoned experts and curious newcomers alike. Whether through tutorials, opinion pieces, or explorations of new digital trends, my goal has always been to provide content that informs, inspires, and provokes meaningful conversations.